Jan. 20, 2026

Practicing Resilience and Gratitude (with special guest Dr. Greg Hammer)

Practicing Resilience and Gratitude (with special guest Dr. Greg Hammer)

This week on a very special episode of Friendless, I sit down with Dr. Greg Hammer—pediatric intensive care physician, recently retired Stanford professor, and author of A Mindful Teen—to talk about what we're actually doing to young people in 2025.

We unpack the unique pressures facing today's teens: smartphones as double-edged swords, the performative perfection trap of social media, sextortion and AI-generated abuse, fentanyl-laced everything, gun violence as background noise, and the impossible college admissions race. You know, light stuff.

But here's the thing—Dr. Hammer isn't here to just list problems. We dig into his GAIN method (Gratitude, Acceptance, Intention, Non-Judgment), a practical framework for building actual resilience without the therapy-speak bullshit. We talk about neuroplasticity, the negativity bias our brains are stuck with from evolutionary baggage, and why telling your kids to be grateful while you complain about traffic doesn't work.

We also get real about recognizing depression versus sadness, the telltale signs parents and teachers miss, and why love needs to be a verb, not just a feeling.

Fair warning: this episode discusses teen mental health, suicide, and self-harm in depth.

In This Episode:

  • Why "kids are resilient" is a cop-out
  • The self-surveillance generation and viral culture paralysis
  • How smartphones and social media rewire developing brains
  • The GAIN method: a 3-minute daily practice for mental resilience
  • Three Good Things: the stupidly simple gratitude practice that actually works
  • Modeling behaviour vs. telling kids what to do
  • Recognizing the signs of clinical depression in teens
  • Why we're all more alike than different (and our dark thoughts aren't unique)

Guest Bio:Dr. Greg Hammer is a pediatric intensive care physician, recently retired professor at Stanford University School of Medicine, and author of Gain Without Pain and A Mindful Teen. He's spent his career studying physical and mental wellness, longevity science, and resilience practices—and has raised teenagers while watching an entire generation navigate challenges he never had to face.

Resources:

Mental Health Resources:

  • Canada: Call or text 988 (Suicide Crisis Helpline)
  • USA: Call or text 988 (Suicide & Crisis Lifeline)
  • Crisis Text Line (both countries): Text HOME to 741741

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